Meet One of Our Featured Brides- Stephanie!

Stephanie is not only one of our bloggers here on Flaming Tulle but she's also a bride-to-be. Her passion for weddings and planning them is really being put to good use now!

Vicky: Let's start with the basics shall we? How did you and Mike meet?
Stephanie: We met in December 2001. Your husband knew Mike from being stationd together in the Marines. Mike was heading down to San Diego one weekend. Your husband, Dom, arranged a phone call between Mike and me and we talked and decided to meet for dinner while he was in town. We've been inseparable ever since.

V: Oh, I remember that night well. We were all at a Happy Hour together when Dom got this bright idea that you two should meet. I thought you two had things in common, but we never expected it to work out this well. So, how did Mike propose and when?
S: In the spring of 2005 Mike spent several months mountain biking in New Zealand. While there, he designed a ring and had it made by a local jeweler. He proposed when I picked him up at the airport, at LAX.

V: I love that! That's the second story I hear about airport proposals. When is the big day?
S: June 25, 2007

V: Have you picked a theme? Colors? A place? What
have you done so far and are willing to give away? I know that you and Mike don't want a lot of things to get out yet about the day.
S: It's at the Brazilian Room in Berkeley, CA. We wanted an outdoor wedding, but love this building, so we're trying to bring the outdoors in with lots of flowers and a natural, rustic feel to the decor. My mom's making my dress. We have a caterer. We've decided on centerpieces and favors, now we just have to actually make them. We decided on a kind of cake, but not a place to get it yet. We know what kind of flowers we like, but will pick out whatever looks nice at farmers' market the day before. At 4 months out, I admit lots of stuff is still up in the air, but we're not worried. We have the basics down for a great party. Most of our friends and family members are traveling from the East Coast and we really just want everyone to have a fun vacation exploring the San Francisco Bay Area. And we are a true team in planning this event. I can't imagine making all these decisions and doing all the work without Mike.

V: Congratulations again and I think the whole event sounds like it's going to be beautiful. I can't wait! Join us soon when we ask Stephanie more questions about her on-going saga in wedding planning and diying the whole event.

Bridal Beauty -- Drinking Water

I was all ready to lament over my inability to drink 8 glasses of water a day. (Who are these perfect super women who can do that? Do they pee in bottles so as to avoid hopping up to go the bathroom every 15 minutes?) Since I started making a conscious effort to track my water intake a few weeks ago, I noticed I only drink the 8 glasses on a day when I go running. And I felt bad about that, thinking that if 8 glasses is for a regular day, then on a running day I should drink even more.

When doing some research I expected to find a bunch of articles berating me for not drinking 8 glasses--experts telling me I must be chronically dehydrated and have bad skin and kidneys full of toxins. (Actually my skin has been looking better over the last couple weeks...) But what I found was some studies saying that 8 glasses isn't for everyone (even Snopes, the urban legend de-bunker, is in on the debate). If you excercise, yes. If you live in an excessively warm climate, yes. If you're trying to lose weight, yes. But if you're a generally healthy-eating person at your ideal weight not excercising every day, then many days you get most of the "water" you need from your diet and other beverages, and may only need 3 to 5 glasses of straight-up water. Basically, if you're peeing clear, you're hydrated (that's what my coach used to tell us, too). If you're thirsty, then you're already slightly dehydrated and should start guzzling.

Everyone agrees that water is good for you. And you can't get too much of it (except in very rare instances). 8 glasses a day is a good guideline to start with, but if you can't do it, don't force yourself. Everyone's body is different and everyone's nutritional needs are different. If the 8 glasses regime works for you, then I'm in awe of how you do it!

What have I noticed since I started drinking my super amounts of water? I have to admit my skin looks better. But I also started using a new toner and night cream recently. I'm drinking less coffee. I guess that's healthy. I can't sleep through the night without waking up to pee. That sucks. I'm filling up with water and eating fewer fruits and veggies. I don't think that's too good. But now that I know I don't need to force 8 glasses upon myself, I can have a salad and skip a glass of water or two, so that should balance out.

Articles. Take 'em or leave 'em.
Snopes.com
CNN Health
WebMD
About.com Nay
About.com Yay

What's a party without cake?

Not much of a party. Unless there are cupcakes then we can talk. Think of this post as part two in your cake planning part of the wedding. I've compiled a handy dandy checklist to get you on your cake way.

You have picked the place and theme for your wedding now you need to focus on the cake. Remember this is a typical focal point at a reception so give it some thought. Ok, if it’s not then at least have it taste divine. Either way, focal point or divine taste you should first meet with bakers about three to six months before the big day. Look over their styles, costs and get a feel for them. Once you find the person you want to work with schedule the wedding date with them and begin the order! I’ve compiled a checklist to help you get inspired and prod you along. As if you need it!

THE STYLE
Think of your wedding cake. What pictures and creations pop into your head? If you are blown away by those images or a few clippings in magazines see below. Which word (or words) best describes the vision you'd like to create?

[ ] Contemporary
[ ] Dramatic
[ ] Ornate
[ ] Structured
[ ] Regal
[ ] Round
[ ] Simple
[ ] Square
[ ] Traditional
[ ] Unique
[ ] Modern
[ ] Funky

THE SHAPE AND STRUCTURE
If you have picked your style then which shape will represent it best? This is where the cake designer can help out.

[ ] Cupcakes
[ ] Hexagonal
[ ] Rectangular
[ ] Round
[ ] Scalloped
[ ] Sheet cake
[ ] Square
[ ] Tiered, stacked

THE USE
Do you want your guests to actually eat the cake or just look at it? If you cannot fathom cutting into that beauty then perhaps you need a fake cake and a sheet cake in a back room. The cake designer can do both. If you want to cut into that scrumptious treat and devour it then it’s a primary dessert cake. Keep in mind that this affects your budget too.

[ ] For show
[ ] Primary dessert
[ ] Both

FLAVORS AND FILLINGS
Like exotic fruit? Are macaroons your thing? Don’t hold back those passions now. Discuss with your baker a way to bring forth some of the flavors you and your future spouse love and incorporate them into the cake.

[ ] Angel food
[ ] Berries and whipped cream
[ ] Carrot (spice)
[ ] Chocolate
[ ] Nuts
[ ] Golden
[ ] Lemon
[ ] Liqueurs
[ ] Mocha
[ ] Mousse
[ ] Orange
[ ] Raspberry
[ ] Truffle
[ ] White chocolate

COLORS
Stick with tradition or select shades that complement your wedding colors -- think bridesmaid dresses and the bridal bouquet. Here are some basics that are used. Feel free though to go wild and think of seasons or upcoming holidays too.

[ ] Baby Blue
[ ] Green (pale)
[ ] Lavender
[ ] Peach
[ ] Pink
[ ] White
[ ] Yellow

DECORATIONS
Details and embellishing extras will transform the look of your cake.

[ ] Chocolate shavings
[ ] Fresh flowers
[ ] Gold or silver leaf
[ ] Pearls
[ ] Sugar blooms
[ ] Toppers

FLOWERS
Sugar-spun flowers or real ones, the sky and your budget are the limit here. Here are our suggestions for flowers that make a lasting impression:

[ ] Hydrangeas
[ ] Lilies
[ ] Orchids
[ ] Ranunculuses
[ ] Roses
[ ] Stephanotis
[ ] Tulips
[ ] Violets

CONCEPTS
The cake should first and foremost taste great. But it should look fabulous, too. Here's a list of ways to consider decorating the cake, beyond the simple chocolate shavings:

[ ] Sugar flowers: Gumpaste can so taste great. Don’t knock it if you haven’t tried it. Designers can make some pretty amazing confections with gumpaste and realistic looking too.
[ ] Fresh fruit: Seasonal fruit dotting the cake can make the whole thing fresh and very appealing. For fall think of tiny apples or grapes.
[ ] Motifs: An innovative way to decorate a cake, we encourage brides and grooms to use their wedding motif on the cake, too. For example, having and I (Heart) your city theme, have the cake designer fashion a cityscape on the sides of the cake.
[ ] Patterns: Antique lace or henna traced hands? The idea of adorning the cake in a pattern that mimics the wedding gown, bridesmaid dresses, or a cultural tradition will only enhance your cake.
[ ] Themes: If you've chosen a theme for your wedding, then those ideas should definitely be visible on the cake.

A GROOM'S CAKE
If you have the budget or it’s tradition in your neck of the woods to have a Groom’s cake then apply the same process given above to this cake. I’ve seen many a school mascot Groom’s cake.

[ ] Yes
[ ] No

NUMBER OF SLICES

[ ] 0-50
[ ] 50-100
[ ] 100-150
[ ] 150-200
[ ] 200+

THE CAKE BUDGET
Estimate the damage before you proceed further. Write it down here: $____________
Does it fit your budget? If so, by all means proceed. If it doesn’t then you might have to think of something simpler. Discuss different options with your baker before things get out of hand. It’s an important day but it really shouldn’t break the bank.


(Part of this checklist is compiled from The Knot.)

Meet One of Our Featured Brides- Ashley!

Flaming Tulle has picked two brides to feature on our site. Congratulations Ashley and resident Flaming Tulle writer, Stephanie for landing the two spots! We'll be following both these brides on their wedding planning adventure. Hear about their tales navigating through reception halls, traverse high and low for their dress, and taste copious amounts of canapes.

Meet Ashley, pictured here with her fiance Brad.



Vicky: So Ashley when's the big day? When did Brad propose?
Ashley: The wedding is April 5, 2008. Brad proposed on New Years Day 2007. He said when he proposed that he wanted to start the year off right.

V: Have you figured anything out like a color scheme yet?
A: Yes, the color scheme is deep blue (midnight or deep navy) and silver with slight accents of pearl. Brad was so excited when I told him, he said “Cowboy colors” (his favorite football team) – didn’t even dawn on me when I chose those colors. Now he says all his guy friends will think I’m the best for picking his team colors. HONEST I didn’t pick his team colors!

V: That's brave of you to admit that. Have you found a wedding site or a dress yet? It's a ways away I know.
A: Well, I have the date and the church all set, some of the church requirements. I’m Catholic and you have to do certain things by a certain time to be married in the Catholic Church. My parents and I are looking at reception sites. I have found one I really like, but still need to look at about four more before we make the decision.

I have an appointment on the 27th of this month at David’s Bridal for my first look-see of dresses. We have begun thinking up the guest list and we have our wedding party picked out. When looking at dresses for me, I’m taking my sister Heather (Matron of Honor) to go dress shopping for bridesmaids dresses also.

I have my tiara and my unity candle, but not the pillars yet. I have lots of ideas in my mind but my big focus right now is the reception site and starting to think about a dress and the dreaded gym to lose more weight.

V: It looks like you are off to a good start though. Tell me, how did you and Brad meet? How long have you been together?
A: We have been dating for just over three years now.

We met at a bar! That’s only half-true, a mutual friend of ours was getting married and he and his fiancé decided to skip the typical Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties and just have a combined gathering at Clyde’s in Reston, for food and drinks. I was sitting at the bar listening talking with the soon to be groom and he turned to talk with a coworker, well more like gossip. Well since I’m such a smarty-pants, I started making comments like “No she didn’t!”, “Well what did he do after that?” “Can you believe that he said that?” and next think I know this guy sitting across from me starts playing along. Next, thing I know we are just talking and low and behold, it was Brad. Believe it or not, he almost didn’t go to that party and I was ready to leave long before I even met him. We spent a while talking and he walked myself, sister and brother-in-law (who was a groomsman and who was slightly intoxicated) to our car (and made sure my brother-in-law got back into the restaurant in one piece) and we went our separate ways. We met again at the wedding and talked a little bit more that night. I called him after getting his phone number. That was about two weeks later I think and he called me back two days later and we talked for hours and had our first date about two weeks after that.

V: Thanks Ashley! We'll be hearing more about how her dress search went shortly. Stay tuned for more from this featured bride!

Cake Trends

I freakin’ love wedding cake. I am obsessed with cakes in general. I have no patience myself in decorating them but I love to admire, ooh and aah, and taste them. When a wedding invitation comes in the mail, I am already marking my mental cake calendar. Cake! I get to eat wedding cake on such and such a date! Yum!

I don’t know why this is but I’ve always loved it. When I was 12, I wanted my birthday cake to be a replica of my aunt’s wedding cake. It didn’t happen. My own wedding cake left a little something to be desired. The flowers were not on the cake as I entered the reception but sitting near the cake. The sugar butterflies showed the decorators lack of creativity and I wish to high heaven I ate more of it because it did taste sinfully good. Saving for our one-year anniversary didn’t cut it. A word of advice bridies, don’t do that. Just eat the cake that week.

What is the point of a cake to this whole affair though? The cake is like a gift from the bridal couple to their guests. An offering if you will to share with them in their new life together. It is the piece de resistance to the reception. A centerpiece to coo over and tie the theme of the wedding together. It should also not taste like cardboard, but shockingly good. There are trends in cakes too. Some years the square is in, or monogramming. Other year’s polka dots or massive floral bouquets hold the mainstream mind. What’s going on this year you ask?

Take a peak~

First up is the Clean and Classic cake. This is one of my personal favorite styles for cakes. These cakes have clean lines and simple designs. Scroll work, minimal colors are used and lots of white on white design are showing right now. The clean and classic cakes may mimic the look of your dress or other pattern featured in the wedding.

Major designs with icing on icing is also popping up in many places. The blue cake shown is very detailed with cityscape scenes despite only using two colors of icing. You will also see cakes with two tones of the same color icing. Champagne with blush-colored hues is another trend.

Big cake? Big flavor. These days it’s not uncommon to find a chocolate lover indulging in an all chocolate cake. No more plain vanilla here. Nut flavors such as pistachio are showing up in cake as are exotic fruit flavors like pineapple or maybe a mango mousse if that is your style. People are no longer afraid that the cake flavor won’t please anyone but themselves.

These are just a few of the trends we have going this year. If you like simple try the clean and classic. Want to spice it up a bit don’t be afraid of flavoring your cake or adding a choice filling. Today’s cake baker’s can do it all. They can even make cakes to look like you, the happy couple.


Note: Cake designs from top to bottom
Rania's Catering, PA Dianne Adrian Photography
Empress Dessert's, WA Katrina Marie Diaz
Cheryl Kleinman
Photos compiled from The Knot.

Low-Budget Weddings – Flower Girl Dresses

You want the little angels to look beautiful. But a practical side of you can't see spending a fortune on kids' clothes--because kids get dirty and they grow out of everything.

At Target this morning I was struck by some of the most beautiful little girls' formal dresses. And the price? $23 and lower. This time of year most department stores should have a good selection of formal kids' wear. Between Easter and First Communion, there are lots of options to choose from for spring and summer party dresses.

Like with the rest of the Wedding Industry, adding "flower girl" to the name of the dress increases the price at a boutique, when really any nice dress will do the job. You don't need to spend a fortune on one-wear-only clothes in order for the little rascals to look adorable if you don't want to.

Engaged & Underaged

Engaged & Underaged is a hilarious, yet sad, new show on MTV. It's obnoxious (so is the website--turn off your speakers before clicking) and nearly unbearable to watch except for the delicious voyeur factor I've mentioned before that comes with wedding planning. The premise is each episode chronicles the last month of wedding planning for youngsters between the ages of 19 and 22. Mostly the parents disagree with the young marriages but sit back and let things unfold. Sometimes with blank checks, sometimes with very little help.

I can't tell the angle of the show. There's pure drama. But are they trying to teach a lesson in waiting until you're older to get married? Or are they encouraging the young unbridled love? There's always the tense cliff-hanger moment just before a commercial break where there's been a fight and maybe they'll call the wedding off! But then they get married after all and everything is peachy. Until the one-month-later follow-up that shows the reality of kids living together. (One couple had gone completely broke and was living in a trailer in one of their parents' backyards. I don't know about them, but I'd rather be dating and living in my parents' house than married and living in my parents' backyard.)

In general, I think very few people are mature enough for marriage at 19 these days. There's so much life out there to live and you can't do all that if you're married. College. Jobs. It's all different. What about the experience of having a couple bad relationships so you know when the really good one comes along? Girls, we have plenty of time to get married. We don't have to move from our parents to our husbands.

An excerpt from one of the episode guides reads, "Bre gave up school and is working to support Josh's dreams of becoming a graphic artist." No no no no no no no! Bre! You are too young to give up your life for a guy. This couple actually buys a house together, and with clever editing, Bre apparently paints and repairs the whole thing herself and forgives Josh for goofing off with his brother instead of helping her. Josh is no dummy and has found a good woman to take care of him in place of his mom. (Seriously. In the post-episode follow-up video, "What I like best about Bre? She takes care of me. Cooks, does the laundry, does the dishes." Makes me want to pull Bre's hair out for sitting there and taking it.)

I feel like maybe I'm being a little harsh? But I am so sad for the state of young women these days. There are so many negative role models and so much negative media and pressure on women and perpetuation of stereotypes. Are we reverting back to the times of marriage instead of school and careers?

On the topic of shoes...

I'm having a hard time deciding on what to get. I love shoes. Why is this so hard?

What makes a bridal shoe a “bridal” shoe? Anything other than it’s white? Or ivory? A couple quick searches at Zappos.com reveal pretty much the same results, whether you search for “bridal,” “white,” or “ivory.” Seems like the bridal shoe industry is another offshoot of the wedding industry racket.

Since it’s my special day can I get away with treating myself to navy satin Pucci pumps (left)? Even though they don’t match the rest of the wedding in any way? I promise I’d wear them all the time to make the purchase worthwhile. (I’ve already designed a black and navy wardrobe around them.)



Or, since my dress is a Vera Wang design, should I treat myself to Vera Wang shoes (right)? They, along with the Puccis, are a bit out of my price range.






Do I have to buy shoes that will only be worn on my wedding day? I’d really love something more wearable. I’m not tied to white or ivory; anything that looks good with the dress would be fine. There's the cheap disposable pair of shoes (left). Under $60. No commitment; no guilt.


I’d prefer not to wear sandals. That way I won’t have to get a pedicure. I hate when people touch my feet, and not choosing a nail polish color is one less decision I’d have to make.

Is this one of those decisions that can wait until, like, a week or two before the wedding to make?

Finding Your Glass Slipper

These days shoes are a really important piece of your wedding day ensemble. The arrival of the Sex in the City girls and their love of shoes skyrocketed the idea of an ‘it’ shoe to many women. Myself? I love them. I think they are cute, but I loathe shopping for them. I always end up airing on the side of practicality. Boring I know, but I have huge feet and I think shoes are overpriced. So sue me.

There is a lot to be said for finding a good shoe for your wedding day. Chances are your fiancé’s shoes will be rented or his ones he already owns. Yours however need to meet some all-important criteria. Really, ladies, do you want to spend a whole day wincing in pain just because a shoe was adorable on the shelf? Here is a rundown of what you need to know. Listen up! Print it out, clip it into your wedding planner or what have you, and get thee to a shoe store or bridal department. If you are lazy like I was though, just order them online and figure it all out in the comfort of your home.

First and foremost, comfort is essential. Remember this when you find those sparkly wonders that have lots of flesh-squeezing straps. You’re going to be standing posing for photos all day in these babies and having to smile beatifically for prosperity. The shoes should not be something you would never normally wear. If you like and can handle super high heels then go for it. If not, your wedding day is not the day to try those bad boys out. Stick to what you know. Some brides wear sneakers under their dresses. Some choose a basic low-heeled pump or ballet flats. Once you find a shoe that, you like the look of and one that fits you comfortably, test it out on the second step. Key note here too- shop at the end of the day as your feet have swelled. You’ll get the best fit.

The second step in finding your wedding day shoes. They should compliment or match the style and color of your dress. You will need to bring your shoes with you to all your dress fittings. The height of the heel will impact the fall and length of your dress. The fabric on the shoe is important too. Often bridal shoes come in silk or satin. These easily stain or can tear so once you own them keep them in safe, clean place until your wedding day. If you aren’t wearing a white or cream-colored dress then just find a shoe that matches the color you are wearing. It’s your day; show your style regardless of the color dress you are wearing! Get funky and down with your bad self in the shoe department. Find a shoe that screams YOU!

So now, the shoes are bought and paid for. You have brought them home and tried them on for your friends, your dog, and maybe the UPS man. There’s one more thing you need to do before you store them away in their safe, clean space. Scuff the hell out of those soles. That’s right; take them out for a spin on some asphalt. I walked around my driveway and sidewalk on a sunny, dry day. I avoided anything that looked damp and icky on the ground, but I twisted my feet and sashayed up and down the path until I had scuffed the soles well and good. There would be no slipping for me on my big day.

That’s it really. It just takes some forethought and not buying just any shoe that a designer says you must have or a bridal magazine throws at you. It’s again all about taking care of you and remembering what you need.

Marriage Is a Partnership

I know content has been a little light. The real world sometimes interfere with the blog-o-sphere. But there will be more to come soon! In the meantime, please enjoy this 1950s instructional video.

Marriage Is a Partnership

Add to My Profile | More Videos

DIY -- Martha's Chocolate Truffles

About a year ago I tried making the Chocolate-Champagne Truffles in Sparkling Sugar in the Winter 2006 Martha Stewart Weddings magazine. I'd never made truffles before, but I'd melted chocolate and openned bottles of champagne, so I figured putting the two together would easy. Maybe the trouble comes from not boiling the milk properly? Or maybe I didn't have the right proportions of ingredients. But several hours later all I had to show for myself was a bowl full of gloopy champagne-flavored chocolate and an open bottle of champagne. I didn't have a stopper for the bottle so I had little choice but to drink it or waste it.

I drank one glass, then fell asleep. The next morning I woke up and the chocolate still hadn't become thick enough to roll into truffles. Martha, what went wrong? Is it because you are a dictator with an army of assistants making vats and vats of champagne-chocolate goop before the truffles finally emerge? Is it because you are perfectionist, measuring every ingredient down to the last grain of sugar, and I'm more likely to eyeball it? Is it because I don't know how to boil milk? (Seriously, what do you do with the skin? Throw it out or just mix it into the chocolate with the rest of the milk? So far I've gone with mixing it in...)

Today I revisited truffles. A different recipe this time, but the same basic principles: boil milk, melt chocolate, mix in flavoring (grapefruit juice), chill, shape into balls, dust with cocoa powder. Currently my bowl is chilling in the fridge. For 1 to 4 hours. I know it needs to reach a certain thickness in order to form into balls, but is it possible to over chill it? What if I forget and leave it in for 5 hours? I guess I'll find out. I just realized that it's 6 pm now, so I could conceivably be rolling truffles at 10 pm tonight. (Or we'll find out what happens when the chocolate chills overnight.)

The moral of the story, kids, is even if you're a good, or even great, cook, if you want to try a new recipe for a big event like a shower, rehearsal dinner, wedding reception, etc., give yourself plenty of time to practice it. I really don't think homemade truffles will be on my menu.

Edited to add: Sunday morning, and the chocolate still isn't thick enough to handle. Grr.

Bridal Beauty Dont's

Most of these are "no-brainers", but for some they do need to actually be brought up again each year. Here are som bridal beauty DONT'S.

1. Don't fake and bake up to two days prior to the wedding. If you do use a tanning bed or lay out in the sun give the redness time to tone itself down. Remember to moisturize too!!! No peely brides allowed!

2. Don't wax any areas on your body or face during the week prior to the wedding. That even means bikini areas. If you are a regular bikini waxer it is probably safe. If you are doing this for the first time for your wedding night or honeymoon, do it earlier to allow time for the area to heal. Swelling or bumps MAY occur. Just be on the safe side.

3. Don't try new make-up looks the day of the wedding. Just don't. Really. That electric eel green liquid eyeliner only looks good when applied by professionals.

4. Don't starve yourself for goodness sake!

5. Don't get a facial the day before of day of your wedding. Allow at least 2-3 days before the wedding. Redness and marks can appear after a facial, especially if extractions are done.

6. Don't dye and perm your hair at the same time. This applies for anytime not just bridal times.

7. Don't touch up your colored nail polish while in your dress.

8. Don't mandate what color make-up your attendants should wear.

9. Don't try to match your make-up to your weddings color scheme.

10. Most Important- Just don't try any new beauty regimes the week of the wedding!

A serious matter

Never teh Bride posted about this recently at Manolo for the Brides. It's important and it bears repeating. It's the not-so-fun part of marriage planning that you just have to do. Wills. Life Insurance. Final Wishes. If your spouse or future spouse is in the military or another job that has him traveling to dangerous places then hopefully you've already discussed this. But it's someting everyone should do. You just never know. Yes, your husband could be in Baghdad, but you could get hit by a car tomorrow. Not to sound morbid, but thousands of married people are widowed with no idea how to handle things, and possibly with no money.

I can't really say it better than Never teh Bride, so please go read her post. It all makes sense. Some of the comments bring up Terri Schiavo and Anna Nicole Smith. While it's not likely your family situation will make headlines, think about how painful it is for the families to not know what to do. You don't want your loved ones to leave you like that, nor do you want to leave them with that. It's about being prepared.

File Under "Love Hurts"

Or maybe "Beauty Is Pain"?

It's Valentine's Day, and since my other half is out of the country right now, I'm spending some quality time with myself tonight. What does that entail? The follow-up to waxing my eyebrows last weekend. Yes, it's confessional time. Last weekend I waxed my eyebrows myself for the first time. I found this little guideline, How to Wax Your Eyebrows. I had the free time, and no plans to see anyone for a couple days (except the kids at Starbucks, who saw me through a really too-dark home-hair-dye job a few months ago), so I figured why not. I took the advice to do it in small patches because I was very afraid of erasing my eyebrows completely. Tonight I followed up with plucking. Why did I wait several days to follow up with the plucking? Because the waxing and the plucking freakin' hurt. I can handle the pain, but once my eyes start to water I have to stop.

Confession #2: They aren't even and I don't know how to get them even. I'm afraid to do more wax, but it's taking forever to pluck them. I don't think it's noticeable to anyone but me. In fact, the kids at Starbucks gave me more pleasant small talk than usual (thanks to the new eyebrows?).

I know this anecdote would be funnier if I had totally ruined my eyebrows and was brave about showing my face in public anyway (with plenty of time for them to grow back before the wedding). But my point is that with some care, even a klutz like me can tame the eyebrows successfully. If you've ever been curious about it, go ahead and try it. I'm just a regular girl trying to make it in this crazy bridal world. Am I victim of bridal peer pressure?

Who Would Have Thunk It

Not me that is for sure! Imagine my surprise when I found this interesting tidbit in Newsweeks, The List, this week. Wedding Insurance. I'm not talking about what if it rains on my wedding day type thing or an errant groomsman falls through the cake. Oh no honey this is for serious stuff! Like military deployments or emergency surgeries on the bride and groom. Seriously. For as little as $160 smackers you too can have the peace of mind that comes with knowing your wedding day is insured.

Part of me thinks this is smarmy and reeks of greedy insurance whores, but the other part remembers the all-consuming panic I felt when my husband almost didn't make our wedding because of military "issues". I remember all to well screaming into the phone about how I was not going to lose all those deposits and have all those people travel to our destination wedding that wasn't. Nope. Not me. I would bill the USMC if that was going to happen. I know it's laughable but I don't like to joke around about my money. Or lack of really.

So, if you are a control freak like me you might want to check it out. If not, it might be good for a laugh. Or as M.S. might say, "It's a good thing".

Poking around BlissWeddingMarket.com

The internet is a weird, wacky place. Researching stuff for your wedding (or your wedding blog) will reveal some scary search results. (Do a Google Images search for “wedding” or “bride” and see how many pictures of Russian mail-order brides turn up in the results.)

Recently my search brought me to BlissWeddingMarket.com. It’s one of those Scary Wedding Industry sites that wants you to spend lots of money.

It’s not enough to have placecards, they have to be held by this creepy angel. The placement of the bottom of the stand makes me very uncomfortable. And cherubs in general freak me out.

As much as I can’t stand this kind of Scary Wedding Industry website, I have to admit these are cute party tickets. Pricey, though. If you're lucky you're a graphic designer or have a friend who is who could easily whip these up.

Mmmm, what a delicious couple.

Initialed toilet paper. I couldn’t make this stuff up.

The thing is, some of this stuff is actually cute, or at least good inspiration. It's just so over-priced. Even if you have an unlimited budget, why would you spend it on these products? It just doesn't make sense.

How do you plan a wedding without tears and hurt feelings?

Wedding planning is making me miserable. Too many tears and hurt feelings. What do I do?

I could bitch and rant that if the planning is causing you so much pain, then maybe you should not rethink the planning, but rethink the marriage. If you can’t sort through all this nonsense beforehand, how are you going to spend the rest of your lives together?

But that sounds mean, doesn’t it? No one wants to hear from an anonymous non-expert that they should rethink their marriage intentions. So I will say, “Yes, there are ways to plan your wedding without all the tears.”

In my experience, communication is the best policy.

Examine the source of the tears. Are they from frustration or exhaustion? If so, then step back and take a break from planning. Wedding planning should not consume your life. Is it really what you want to be doing all the time? Talk to your partner, friends, and family about anything else for a while. A lesson I learned early on is that while the wedding is of major importance in my life, it’s not the most important thing in the life of everyone else I know. It’s too easy to alienate people with non-stop wedding talk. (Do you friends get a glassy-eyed, glazed-over look about five minutes into the conversation? If so, then stop talking immediately!) Make sure you continue with all the normal things you did pre-wedding planning time.

Are the tears due to some sort of miscommunication? If so, then you need to talk it out with whomever you feel has mis- or non-communicated with you—preferably over the phone or in person. Email exchanges are far too impersonal for a conversation about something that is making you feel so bad.

Are they due to the fact that you’re just not getting the wedding you wanted? Have you compromised yourself right out of your dreams? Whether the concerns are family or budget related, you still have to talk about them. With your partner—what is the dream wedding for the two of you? What are your must-haves? What can be changed or eliminated if the budget dictates? With your family and friends—What roles do you want them to play in the planning and actual wedding and what roles do they expect to play? Without talking to them, how will you know what they expected and how will they know what you expected? I know it’s not easy to put all of this talking into practice with everyone, so do it for the important stuff. It’s so cliché and tacky to say, but “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” Is your mom being too overbearing? Give her a project to work on, take her out for lunch and shopping; she just wants to help and feel included. Is your great aunt going to give you crystal swan salt and pepper shakers that aren’t on your registry? Just let her—it’s not a big deal in the long run.

Or you can just say, “Screw this,” and elope.

Never forget that while the wedding is a fun party, the marriage is the important part.

Low-Budget Weddings – Location, Location, Location

There are many ways to save money on your wedding. One large part of your budget will be venues--both for the ceremony and the reception.

The first thing to think about might be a no-brainer: Can you have the ceremony and reception at the same place? And if so, can that place be a family member’s home? If you answer “yes” to those questions, then there is your instant low-cost wedding.

But a home wedding might not be what you want, and that’s okay.

Is there any place you have your heart set on? Even if you think it will be out of your budget, go visit that place. It won’t cost you anything to look around and ask some questions. You may find that costs you hadn’t considered may be included in the price of the venue. The price of the church may include the officiant and a musician. The reception hall cost may include catering and centerpieces. Shifting your budget around may make your dream a reality.

Think about public places. National, state, and regional parks are often free or low-cost. Municipal buildings--which can include museums, historical houses, libraries, and theaters--host events and rent their space, often at a discount to local residents. These kinds of places also usually come with some restrictions, so be sure to do some research and read the fine print.

When do you want to have the wedding, and are you willing to be flexible in order to save some money? May through October is the prime wedding season in most areas and venues will charge more during that time. Summer resort towns will charge less for a winter wedding (and winter wonderlands will charge less during the summer). Venues may also charge more over holidays, including those three-day weekends we all love. Also, what day of the week? A Monday wedding may be cheaper than a Friday, Saturday, or Sunday wedding.

We wanted a June wedding, so had to get creative when it came to finding a low-cost location that would hold about 100 people. After a lot of research, we found the Brazilian Room, a historic building in a regional park. Being county residents entitled us to a 20% discount. And we decided on a Monday wedding to save even more money.

It takes some work, but if you are on a limited budget you can still find the perfect location for your wedding. The internet is great for initial research, but eventually you will have to call and visit some places. It's daunting at first, so get your future spouse involved. You don't have to do it all by yourself. You're both trying to save money and have a great wedding.

Some links to get you on your way:
Google Search: "theater rentals, wedding"
National Park Weddings
7 Ways to Save on an Off-Season Wedding

DIY Save the Date Cards -- Valentine's Day

If you plan on sending your save the date cards in February, or plan on having your wedding near Valentine's Day, I was thinking that those boxed kids' valentines that are sold at stores like Target and CVS would be cute (and inexpensive--and after Wednesday even cheaper) save the date cards. What sweeter way to celebrate your wedding than with the theme of candy pink love? Especially in the form of Snoopy, Hello Kitty, Spongebob Squarepants... dozens of your favorite characters to choose from.

You'd have to write your save the date message on each one because they're too small to go through the printer. You have to buy new envelopes if they're being mailed (all craft stores, and the stationery aisle of some drug stores, sell plain note-card sized envelopes).

They could also be used as placecards at a Valentine's Day event. They are informal, but they are unique and whimsical. They might be just what you need to set the tone for your wedding and your wedding planning.

Are you ready for marriage?

Are You Ready for Marriage?

Add to My Profile | More Videos

Watch this 1950s instructional video to find out if you are ready for marriage. It's about 15 minutes long. While hilarious in its quaintness, it raises some good points about making sure you're planning a life together, not just planning a wedding. Like, "What will you do for money?" Why that's easy! Sue doesn't need a higher education once we get married, so we can use her college fund! All joking aside, the moral of the story is that marriage planning is important.

Colors

I was watching “Married Away” on the Style network recently and to make a long story short, the bride picked out hot pink as the main reception color (the groom sat silently, smiling politely), but when the wedding planner got to the hotel banquet hall with one of the special-order hot pink tablecloths, she saw that the color clashed horribly with the wallpaper and carpet in the room. Note: Look at your reception hall before deciding on hot pink tablecloths. (The hotel party planner’s idea to bring it all together—add more pink! And sparkles!)

On the subject of colors, I hate the question, “What are your wedding colors?” It makes me feel like I have to conform to some pre-packaged wedding formula. Yes, my bouquet is dark purple and we’re bringing in lots of greenery… but saying our colors are purple and green just does not convey the image we have of our wedding. I really want to tell people we don’t have colors and leave it at that. There’s so much pressure to say something.


Who says we have to have colors? Yes, there should be some sort of decorative color scheme to pull the room together, especially for a semi-formal to formal wedding. That holds true for just about any party. But how do you avoid the niche industry that has evolved around wedding colors? Bridesmaids’ dresses, napkins, flowers, favors, candles… if you want it all to match, someone out there can be paid enough to make that happen for you.

But how do you find your inspiration color? And how do you plan a party around it without making the whole thing look like a dyed-to-match nightmare?

More to come on this...

The Bride Diet

Don’t crash diet to lose weight a few weeks before the wedding! For one, your dress won’t fit and the seamstress who had your dress fitting just perfectly is going to be very annoyed with you. No matter how large or small you are a dress that fits well is going to look so much nicer than a dress that does not fit.

Also, it’s not healthy. Why would you want to put yourself through all that just for one day of so-called thinness?

No crash diet is healthy, no matter what your reasons are for embarking on it. It takes months of integrating healthy habits into your lifestyle. A good diet has more benefits than just weight loss, too. Good nutrition improves the quality of your hair and skin. You’ll have more energy. You’ll decrease your risk for health problems later in life.

Although, a healthy overhaul in your habits troubles me if it’s being done only for the wedding. Really, it should be a lifestyle change that will benefit you for many years to come, and you can use the wedding as a motivation point to get started.

And get your partner involved, too. If you get all fit and buff, do you want a slob standing next to you at the altar? It’s not just your life that’s being impacted; you want a long and happy life for the two of you, right?

I’m not a nutritional expert, and I’m not perfect. I have a 20-pound cat sitting on one side of me as I type, and a huge bag of M&Ms sitting on the other side of me. You can look all over the internet for advice and tips. Here’s what works for me, based on my personal experience and goals of overall fitness:
Running
Weight training for my arms
Crunches for my abs (also, laying down with a 20-pound cat on your stomach is a great abs workout)
Drinking lots of water and herbal tea
Eating soy (Deep-fried and drowned in green curry is still good for me, right?)
Eating lots of fruits and vegetables (including—bleck—broccoli)

Attendants

I have seen and read about brides having nervous breakdowns over the attendants. Bridesmaids, groomsmen (ushers), junior bridesmaids… etc. How many should there be for a formal wedding? What do I do with an uneven number? I don’t even want to get in to quibbles over best friends and ex-best friends and their maid of honor duties.

In these confusing times, I look to Emily Post. Emily Post on Weddings has a whole chapter on attendants. As much as I love Emily, I happen to disagree with her on much of her attendant advice. But she provides a guide for getting me started, fodder for my attendant thoughts.

She frowns on “men of honor” and “best women” but I think that is all right. I was a best woman once and all the guests thought it was sweet.

Emily also says that it’s okay to have more ushers than bridesmaids, but one must never have more bridesmaids than ushers. She gives no explanation why, and I can’t really think of a good one either. So I say, who cares? You might say, But at the end of the wedding and everyone exits, how will the bridesmaids and ushers walk out as couples if there’s an uneven number? And to that I say, who cares? All the guests will be focused on the bride and groom and won’t pay any attention at all to a stray bridesmaid or usher.

Did you know that, according to Emily, it’s not obligatory to include your sisters or your partner’s sisters as bridesmaids? She makes the distinction between obligatory and customary. Since many sisters assume they will be bridesmaids, it’s good to get that communication out in the open right away. Discuss the whos and the whys with your partner, then tell all the attendants as soon as they are decided upon. (Also tell them as soon as you can what their expectations and duties are.)

It’s okay to disagree with Emily (except in cases of overt rudeness of course). That’s sort of the beauty of having her around. Not caring what Emily thinks gives me license to not care what others might think. If a wedding guest is seriously watching my ceremony to make sure everything is on the up-and-up with my attendant selection and their duties, then that guest needs to get a life—and I’ll be taking notes at her wedding to make sure everything is to a “t”.

(Actually, we aren’t having any bridesmaids or ushers, just a maid of honor and a best man. Will our guests wander around aimlessly without ushers on hand? I was at a large, formal wedding that seemed to take Emily’s advice of one usher per every 50 guests, but none of the ushers did any ushering. We guests did sort of wander around looking for familiar faces in hopes of saved seats. Do I need to rethink having ushers? I don’t want any additional bridesmaids and, horror of horrors, I could end up with an uneven number! Oh, wait, we are having cocktail hour before the ceremony. I think people will have taken too much advantage of the open bar to care. Problem solved.)

DIY Wedding

Some of us are crafty. Sewing, knitting, paper-folding, hot gluing--there are lots of crafty hobbies you can incorporate into your wedding to make the event more personal. Doing some things yourself can save money. It also takes time, though, and as the wedding approaches you will find less time to spend with your hot glue gun, so choose your DIY wedding projects carefully. For instance, I love baking, but would never attempt to make my wedding cake. I’ll be making favors and centerpieces that can be assembled in advance and kept in the closet until show time.

The emergence of crafting mega-stores like Jo-Ann’s and Michael’s have made it easy for anyone to do something themselves, from invitation kits that you print at home to candles and silk flowers for centerpieces, to the fabric and patterns needed for sewing your own dress. (I sew, but I’m not attempting to make my own dress, either.) Those store also have some incredible sales, so if you think you'll be needing some supplies from them, sign up for their mailing lists so you buy and stockpile things as they go on sale. Most towns have boutiques for specialty fabrics and paper if you want something that won't be found just anywhere. And of course, almost anything you need can be bought on the internet somewhere. (My newest internet love is Save on Crafts.)

Personally, I love Martha Stewart’s magazines, especially the Good Things sections. (I could plan 100 weddings with Martha’s ideas!) But some of those projects are hard! Or include high-end materials that just can’t be found by the average person. Or require a staff of helper-bees to do most of the work. So I give them a try and do the best I can. I have more inspired-by Martha projects than actual Martha projects.

As we go along with this blog, I’ll chronicle my crafting experiences. The mister has asked that I not reveal too much about our own wedding until after it happens, but I have plenty of other crafting stories to share.

Favors 2

To follow up with Vicky, I think that most of the offerings from the Wedding Favor Industry are tacky pieces of junk. See the engagement ring key chain favor. I'm not making this up. It's a "real key chain" that "features an enormous faux diamond." Is this seriously what you want your wedding budget to go toward? (Last time I checked, this item was on backorder, which means people are actually buying it, and want to buy more! C'mon!)

Like at any party, appropriate favors at the wedding reception can add to the festivities. Little boxes of candies or chocolates or other snack items are usually welcome by everyone. Fun favors can be a part of the overall theme of the party. One wedding I went to was a 1930s themed costume party, and the favors were masks like what might have been worn at a costume party in the 1930s. The guests had a good time playing with their masks. Favors can be part of the table decor. I'd like to make some little doo-dad from the same dried flowers that will be used in our centerpieces. People may take them home as a keepsake or not, but at least they'll look nice on the table, and that's what's important to me. I love the idea of small potted plants for an eco-friendly reception but they would not be easy for out-of-town guests to transport home, so take your guests into consideration when deciding on favors. (I once took an entire live-plant centerpiece home from a wedding and replanted it in my garden--once the bride gave the go-ahead for people to take them home. I no longer have a garden, so have no use unfortunately for live-plant favors or centerpieces myself.)

Think long and hard about personalized favors. They may be important to you, but what about the frequent wedding guest who has a cupboard full of mismatched wine glasses, shot glasses, votive holders, and coasters with other peoples' names on them? Those get put away to collect dust, and then eventually thrown out. If you must personalize something, invest in personalized ribbon or paper for wrapping the favors in.

As someone who loves planning parties, I love the idea of the right favor. But as Vicky said, they are not going to make or break the wedding, so think about them carefully. Especially if you are on a tight budget, where do you really want that money going?

But They Are So Cute!

Favors

To have or not to have; that is the ultimate question. On the other hand, it may just seem that way when you are planning your wedding and inundated with bridal magazines galore. Those cute beribboned boxes are advertised heavily there, sucking you in, making you think your wedding is not complete without personalized cookies. Martha Stewart, a wedding genius in many respects, has cornered the favor idea market. Maybe your friends are also in the throes of planning their weddings and the emphasis on favors is strong. It’s true in some areas of the U.S. (like New Jersey) favors, be it a tiny box of chocolate or a bookmark, seem quite important. Personally, I don’t think they are. I think that while they can be quite personal, in the end no one really cares about the favors but you. If you are crafty and have the time, go for it. If you have the extra budget and want to shower your guests with tiny votives or monogrammed matchbooks, fine. Have at it! However, having or not having favors does not make or break a wedding. Don’t be pressured by heavy-duty marketing or a relative into thinking it will. Bad food ruins a wedding. Sloppy drunk groomsmen can tackle that no problem. Bud vases or picture frames to take home do not.

I’d like to get the ultimate DIY girl herself to weigh in on this issue so Stephanie please take the floor and favor us (I couldn’t resist) with your opinion.

It's A Family Affair

My mother isn't involved in the wedding planning process at all. I don't plan on getting married again so I want her to be part of it this time around but she really doesn't seem interested at all. I end up feeling let down and hurt most of the time which is NOT how I want this whole thing to go. Help!

Fear not, I am familiar with this syndrome! Most people have overly involved mothers and right now you are probably wishing for even a smidgen of that attention right?

Let me ask you this. Do you call your mother and ask her to participate? When you picked out your dress or have a fitting have you asked her to be present for it? If not, then first try that! You might be surprised. She might be the type of person who actually wants you to do things your way and not get overly involved. Refreshing for most readers I'm sure.

If that isn't the case and you have already done that simple task then write her a letter, take her to lunch, or again call her and explain (in a non-whiney "this is my day!" voice that I know you have) how important it is to you that she be part of this one-time process. Tell her you love her and want her with you during parts of it. She doesn't have to be duct-taped to your side. Give her specific areas you would like her advice telling her how much you value her opinion in those areas. Maybe she loves china? Ask her for help there! Does she like flowers or arranging them? Then she'd be great in that department. In the end I bet she comes around and will be glad to help. Chances are she just didn't want to be the Mother of Bridezilla that is often depicted these days.

The Benefits of a Wedding Website

The Benefits of a Wedding Website

These days when virtually everything is well virtual, you can do almost anything online. Pictures are online, vendors can be contacted, and portfolios viewed via the World Wide Web. You email your friends and family the story of your engagement and keep your bridesmaids updated thrice daily on what you want, need, love and hate about the whole wedding shebang. Why not create a wedding website?

The benefits of a wedding website are easy. First, it keeps people updated on all the important information about the wedding itself. It can tell the story of how you crazy lovebirds met, what the proposal was like and if you are having a dress code for the event. You can even link your registry to your site. People can leave you wonderfully, sweet messages too. Some sites even have countdowns to the big day if you’re into that kind of thing.

A wedding website can also help keep you organized. When life gets chaotic with floral messes, fittings and bridesmaid fights you can refer to everything quickly and efficiently by simply logging onto your own site. Everything is right there for viewing, even directions to the church are there. It will give you piece of mine, voyeurs in your family something to gawk at and make the day that much more official.

RSVP and Response Cards

I assumed that since I'm planning my reception--doing the seating chart, giving head count to the caterer, etc.,--the response cards would be sent to me. But my mom says they must go to her, that it just doesn't look right for the response cards to go directly to the bride. However, she lives an hour away from me, and she says she won't open any of the cards, she'll just come by every weekend with a bunch of them. If she's not even opening them, what's the point of them being sent to her?

I don’t know Vicky’s feelings about this, but I am anti-response card (which eliminates the above addressee issue). Emily Post says they are not in good taste. However, recent editions of Emily Post on Weddings concede that they may be justified because, “Unfortunately many people today do not bother to answer a wedding invitation promptly.” (The sentence actually ends with “by hand,” but I’ll get to that in a moment.)

I will lead the charge against using response cards. They are cold and impersonal. In general, we are a society that chooses convenience over meaning. While it may be too much to expect hand-written notes in response, a phone call or even an email is more personal than a checkmark on a pre-printed card. It’s a great icebreaker for opening up communication with family members or old friends you maybe haven’t heard from in a while. It lets your invitee give heart-felt regrets if he can’t attend. If you are having a large wedding, you won’t be able to spend a lot of time with each guest during the reception, so spending a few moments talking with them beforehand will make them feel even more welcome.

If you are on a strict budget they are an additional expense, because not only are you buying the cards and envelopes (and paying for them to be printed), it’s expected that you include postage on the envelope. Those costs add up. Are there other elements of your wedding that had to be changed or removed because of the budget? Eliminate those cards and get back something you really wanted.

They are not eco-friendly. More paper means more trees being cut and more trash being produced.

Eliminating response cards demands that we also become better guests. You can start leading by example the next time you are invited to any event by responding immediately to the host. People will notice how you respect them and their event and will do the same for you when your wedding invitation arrives. Having a party is not one-sided. The guests must respect the host and vice-versa.

Unfortunately, even if you do include response cards with your invitations, there will always be some people who will not RSVP. That’s just life. Some of their reasons will be justified (falling into a coma the same day the invitation arrives) and some of their reasons won’t be (laziness). I can’t find Emily’s opinion on if it’s okay to contact those people for an answer. TheKnot.com says it’s okay to contact them because you must provide an accurate headcount to the caterer. I find that The Knot gives us too much license to be bridezillas and that most caterers are prepared to handle a few extra or a few less guests. (I guess I’m leaning toward not contacting the no-responders, but we’ll see what happens when I’m actually in that spot.)

So, if, after all that, you still insist on using response cards, have them sent to whomever needs the guest list for the headcount and making the seating chart. That’s just logic. If it’s a question of your mom feeling left out, let her be the word-of-mouth contact person for gift registries and other similar information.

Your Bridal Skincare Routine

You’ve set the date and picked out your invitations everything seems to be under control until you realize one crucial thing you are forgetting. You. You are forgetting the importance of taking care of yourself in the all the wedding commotion.

Some experts say that a bride must start her bridal skincare routine at least six months out in order to truly be a blushing bride. I think that is a bit extreme. If you are going to try something new then I say, give it two maybe three months tops to begin treatments. However, if you are just going to be extra diligent with your skincare rituals (which I highly endorse) then, begin that at least one month before the big day.

First up is determining what type of skin you have. Is it oily, sensitive, combination, mature or acne-prone? Does it often feel dry in patches or all over? Often times a dry skin can become incredibly oily after switching to a new product line. Never fear! That will quickly remedy itself within a week of the new products use. It was just your skin’s way of saying, “Help! I’m way too dry! FIX ME!”

Next step is using a good cleanser that matches your skin. You don’t want something that is harsh or full of soapy detergents either. My rule is the less ingredients and chemicals in the cleanser and the less it lathers, the better off your skin is. A good toner is next for your skin, one that suits your skin type. This will help balance out whatever issues your facial tissue is having.

The third step is the most important. Moisturize, moisturize. Moisturize your entire body daily from head to toe, not just your face. If you are not used to using body lotion pick out one that you like so it makes it fun and easy to remember to use each day. Remember to purchase a separate eye cream for the delicate tissue around your eyes and dab it on delicately. Never rub it in, as it will cause the skin to sag later. Apply a facial lotion each morning and one before bedtime too. This will encourage even more of a balance in your skin. If possible, use products from the same line as they will compliment each other and add to your beauty arsenal. Try to apply the facial lotion in an upwards motion each time you apply. We must fight gravity wherever we can!

Once a week use a facial scrub to eliminate dead skin cells and rejuvenate your skin. A good masque will also help. The scrub can be done in the shower at anytime day or night. There is no need to try and schedule it in. Slather on the masque when you have a few extra minutes before heading into the shower and rinse it off then. This doesn’t have to be a hard chore.

It may seem like a lot of work if you aren’t used to this type of thing, but combined with drinking 8-10 glasses of water a day you skin will glow and be the best it can be come your wedding day and all the days before and after. Besides, it only takes two weeks of doing something for it to become routine.

So remember- wash your face twice a day, morning, and night. Tone and moisturize it too. Apply a masque and facial scrub once a week to keep you looking your best.

A great product line to use is Arbonne. They are 100% Vegan, all natural with a limited amount of packaging. The products speak for themselves in just a few days time and if you don’t like them, there is a 45-day money back guarantee. For more information ask Vicky and visit the Arbonne website at www.arbonne.com to check the product lines out yourself! Great gifts for bridesmaids can also be found there.

Thank-you Notes

You’re back from your honeymoon, or you’ve recovered from those bridal shower mimosas, and you have one very important task to take care of right away: thank-you notes. They must be sent as soon as possible, and they must be hand-written, and they must be nice.

Think of it in one of two ways:
1) Someone went through the trouble of finding the perfect gift for you and wrote a heart-felt congratulatory note to go along with it. You owe them an equally heart-felt thank-you.
2) Someone once sent you a carbon-copy “Thank you for your gift” note and it made you feel unappreciated, so you must now kill them with kindness.

Much has been written on proper thank-you note guidelines. One article I particularly like is this one by Leslie Harpold: How to Write a Thank-You Note.

I would only add that for weddings, since the gift is for the couple, the note should be from the couple. Ideally, “Mike and I want to thank you … Love, Stephanie,” since only one of you is physically writing the note. And feel free to put some of the responsibility on your husband. Notes to his friends and family that you may not know well can certainly come from him. (Remind him that he’s going to be using the gifts, too, so it’s only fair for him to share some of the hand cramps.)

Welcome!

We are two friends who love weddings. Planning a wedding is a fantastic party puzzle. The dreams. The budget. The guest list. The flowers. They all have to come together in one beautiful moment. But it's also a lot of work and there will be high points and low points. And it may begin to consume your life. We don't want that to happen to anyone. It's possible to keep your sanity and your identity while planning the wedding of your--and your partner's--dreams.

I'm currently planning my own wedding (for June 25, 2007), and it's all Vicky's fault. She invited me to her wedding several years ago, where upon meeting her husband for the first time he told me "I found someone for you." That someone is the man I'm currently married to and will be wedding-ing in June. (Yes, we're married. We are now planning the big wedding we want.)

We will share personal experiences from our own weddings and those of others. We love etiquette and manners. Vicky knows all about skincare, makeup, hair care, all those personal beauty issues that mystify tomboys like me. I'm a DIY (do-it-yourself) bride with crafty tips. Together we feel we have a lot to say on the subject of weddings.

Vicky and I welcome feedback. Email us with your stories, subject ideas, or questions. There is a delicious voyeurism in wedding blogging. You know, or else you wouldn't be here either.

Welcome to yet another wedding blog. We hope you'll find this one different, funny, informative, or at least entertaining enough to forward on to some friends.

And to prove that we are not wedding obsessed, please visit our personal blogs:
Stephanie: Where in the World Am I?
Vicky: The Mummy Chronicles

Congratulations on your marriage! And thank you for stopping by.